
Dearest Internet
I write to you today to confirm the many scandalous rumours that have been circumnavigating your innermost bowel over recent weeks. I feel ashamed, and more than a little hurt, that you would circulate these wild and fantastic inter tit bits without first consulting me, Barnaby Fudge, your confidant, friend and more than occasional lover. Do not think I haven't noticed your web based floozys, parading their Art Brut news items and exclusives for the whole virtual world to see. I will not be made a fool of, sir. Not by you, and certainly not by any so called virtual music publication. The tramps.
Nevertheless, for the sake of the years we had together, I will say this. Art Brut are indeed leaving these icey shores Oregon bound. And. yes, they will be excitedly thrust into the legendary arms of Mr. Charles Michael Kittridge Thompson IV, or to you, dearest Internet, Frank Black. Under his loving supervision they will be banging out the hits as quickly as their little guitars and unique singing styles will carry them. The undertaking has been provisionally titled Art Brut vs. Satan, referencing their recent and well publicised diabolical bout, or 'Mits in the Pit', as many vulgarians such a yourself have so brashly dubbed it. I can also confirm the inclusion of many recent live favourites, such as DC Comics and Chocolate Milkshake, Alcoholics Unanimous and Summer Job for your greedy sound pipes.
So, I hope you are now finally satisfied, my beloved Internet. Watching as I lag behind your rotten info web harlots. I may be late in dishing the dirt but I am certainly not covered in it. I hold my head high, proud in that, even though I may not be the first to report on the movements of our Brutish gang, I am certainly the only one whom has known true love between a man and an infobahn.
yours regretfully
Barnaby Fudge
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